Ok, so this idea for a blog column came to me about a year ago when my boys and I were watching the Yankees just shit all over another squad like 10-1, and as a matter of fact I think it was Baltimore so nothing new there. The game was slow and boring obviously cause offense slows the game down anyway and well it was a meaningless matchup for the Yanks in the beginning of the season against the O's.
The Yankees announcer lineup for that series included Michael Kay, Ken Singleton, and my personal favorite, for reasons to come, Paul O' Neill. By the time the late innings came, baseball hardly became a topic for these guys' game convo but my boy O'Neill just took it to another level of obnoxiousness.
While Singleton reminisced over his years in Baltimore when they actually won, and Kay just agreed while he was rubbing Singleton's nuts under the table, Pauly chimes in out of nowhere to say:
"You know guys, sometimes there's just nothing better then getting off."
Along with Kay, Singleton, the rest of the YES viewers, myself and my friends included, to say we were stunned would be a gross understatement. Kay tried to save the broadcast and spit out the only thing he could say:
"Uhhh, Paul, were...uh, were live Paul." Everyone's mind blown. Boom!
That wasn't the first, and it certainly hasn't been the last time I have heard an out of context line from a sports commentator come out perverted, creepy or just downright questionable. So thanks to Paul O' Neill, The SportsBrahs will be bringing you quotes from "perverted announcers" each and every time these closet horn dogs let one out of their mouth.
For the first one ever, here are some from the ESPN announcers during the 2010 Homerun Derby in L.A.
1.) "He's swinging hard, but he's got that good rhythm, timing."- Joe Morgan.
-Joe Morgan, are you serious? Don't you know that the key to phenomenal masturbation requires technique, immense concentration, and MOST importantly timing and rhythm. The harder you swing the more you create stress on your body and that's how you get injured. Joe, better get back to the film room bro.
2.) "I'll get it down, just wait, I'll get it down there."- Bobby Valentine on what Corey Hart's designated pitcher said to him while hitting.
- Well, there's just so many different directions I could go in with this one, but I suppose if i don't go with the most perverted i'm just cheating the fans and the people that know me best. Obviously Hart's pitcher is saying to be patient, concentrate hard, and if he does all that then he can fit his johnson all the way up his butt. I can picture what the rest of that quote would be like. "Corey, widen your stance so I can fit it in there, right where you like it." Definitely something like that.
3.) "Daddy duty calling ya, thanks Corey Hart."- Erin Andrews.
-Ok, so we all know why i'm putting this one up. Possibly because Ms. Andrews is one of the better sideline reporters in all of sports. Maybe, its just her beautiful boobies and fabulous body. I bet she does shag like a minx, but now back to business. I couldn't help but think while she was interviewing Hart after his 0 home run performance in round 2 that she just wanted to jump his bones right there on the field. Now that's what rocking Abe Lincoln esque beards will do for you and your luck with hot chicks."Daddy duty calling ya?" Erin are you serious? why don't you just say you want to jerk him off in the dugout while saying "what a lovely tea party." I mean, come on. Dudes love that kinda shit. Mad props to Corey Hart for keeping it in his pants cause I was struggling to do so.
-Dbl-A
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