Seeing this picture was like the first time I felt a pair of boobs. Supremely overjoyed, but so confused as well. How was I living up until this point? Was this some kind of secret the entire world was keeping from me a la Jim Carey in the Truman Show? Why hadn't I ever discovered these soft, god like pillows before? It's like where was I for my entire life before this moment. Earth shattering stuff. It's like the first time you used a wireless controller to play video games with. You were so overwhelmed with how cool it was that you never want to think of gaming without one ever again. That's what this picture has done for me.
Being the greatest soccer player on Earth seems to have its perks. Messi is barely older then me and he's walking around with the hottest piece of tail this side of the prime meridian. I mean, I can totally see where Messi's coming from. He loves soccer right? It's what he does, and what better feature on a woman to be attracted to then by having her greatest asset (get it?) shaped like soccer balls. It only makes sense. Messi lives and breathes this sport, so it would only make sense for her two butt cheeks to look like regulation sized FIFA soccer balls. It's probably in his best interest to not have his mitts all over them though because it might get him into bad habits. Hand balls are no no's in the soccer world, so we don't want Messi to start getting confused because his girlfriend has the nicest pair of buns your boy Dbl-A has ever seen.
I should have played soccer...shit.
-Dbl-A
No comments:
Post a Comment