This is some depressing news my friends. The bottom line is that life is too short NOT to be spending it competing in the World Sauna Championships. That's what I'm talking about. These guys are flipping tough as nails. Withering away in 200 + degree heat while onlookers stare at you and poke at the glass like your in a god damn fishbowl. UFC, bull riding, and street luging don't hold a candle to this shit. Sweat your balls off, or be a pussy. Your choice.
That's why this is so upsetting. A man perished demonstrating his balls to the wall attitude. I for one, am an experienced Sauna user. So I obviously respect this dude. After I bust my ass everyday in the gym getting my swell on and making mommies sweat, what better way to top off the day? I basically train for this competition everyday, and I don't even realize it. How so you ask? Well, it just so happens the sauna at my gym is perfectly located behind the swimming pool and hot tub, so you can just people watch all day, every day. By people watching, I am referring to ogling as much bathing suit tush as far as the eye can see. So if there's a hot chick chillen in the pool or hot tub, i'll stay in there until she bounces, in hopes of getting some low key eye fucking in. It's like I'm training to outlast all these Sauna aficionados, and I don't even mean to. Oh, and by that time I can't even function anyway. Gotta have the janitors shovel me out like a soggy prune. Better make that a soggy, perverted prune.
And what's the deal with the cultural secretary stating the obvious like an insensitive prick? Some guy just just took a dirt nap here, and it seems like this other dude just wants to catch a happy hour and call it a day. 25 cent pitchers in this guys honor on me bro.
-Dbl-A
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