TMZ - Yesterday, Kourtney Kardashian (left) took her booty out for a stroll in Cabo ... and unlike her little sister Kim (right), she managed to fit her entire ass into her swimwear.
Woah. Too much dumper going on here. I cannot believe I just said that, but it almost seems like a joke at this point with the Kardashians. Like Kim for example has always been known for having a famously marvelous dumper. Had that shit since day 1. I'm pretty sure they were copping her custom diapers for years just to fit her planet sized turd cutter into one. I mean, imagine the kind of dumps she takes? Holy Hell. I can picture a zombie movie staring just her ass: The toilet of 1,000 Kardashian Dumps. And you thought Linda Blair's spinning head in The Excorcist scared you? Yeah, just picture this horrific scene: The priest is on the verge of a breakdown screaming "The power of Christ compels you" while Kim Kardashian's demon-possessed pumpkin bottom just keeps rocketing turds throughout the room. Her ass goes ape shit. Starts trying to kill. "My head!! ahhhh, her ass is eating my damn head." Blood and shit cover the walls, the priest is now decapitated and Kim is sitting there watching old Reggie Bush USC highlights and eating an ice cream sundae. Looks innocent, but that ass will KILL you. Hey Wes Craven, you think you could top that?
But all kidding aside, I love what Kim does, or rather doesn't do. I mean she's labeled as a "socialite" or in laymen's terms - a professional whore. I'm fine with that she's clearly good at what she does. Look at these NFL stars, they are dropping like flys.
Always thought this family reminded me of a sports franchise. Heck, so many comparable components. You got Kourtney, the oldest of the sisters and easily the most veteran and savvy of them all. She know's how to stay in the spotlight regardless of age. Have a baby with a Hitler incarnate and complain how your younger sister is WAY hotter then you every time on your show. Great publicity. Kim is easily the hottest, and she's like the Kobe Bryant of the family. Basically they are fucked with out her. She's the leader, and the glue that holds it all together. Poor Khloe got screwed in the gene pool, but she's got to cut her losses and realize the dream is over. She ain't making it to the majors, so enjoy a minor league career for the rest of your life. I think that was a nice way of saying it. Finally, the younger sisters are hot prospects. Not sure if Chris Hanson is coming after me now, but they are highly touted and have been considered "talented" for awhile now. I mean, they are basically the Stephen Strasburghs of the Kardashian family. Cant miss prospects.
-Dbl-A
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