The Rent Is Too Damn High

The New York State gubernatorial race is an absolute dog fight. DemocRAT Andrew Cuomo and Ultra Conservative Carl Paladino slinging mud like Favre slings picks while my Long Island homeboy Rick Lazio has to settle for the Independent party's nomination and sits quit in the corner.


I know Dbl-A has throw his support to Anti Prohibition candidate Kristin Davis and her huge rocking tits but lets get real, the kid would throw his support to anything he could put his millimeter peter into. Thankfully, we have Jimmy McMillan who really has us New Yorkers' best interests at hand.

Just look at that facial hair. That’s one awesome display of courage to rock that masterpiece. I haven't seen a facial hair arrangement like that since 7th grade when the Civil War history books introduced me to the late great General Ambrose Burnside (yes, that’s were the term sideburns comes from, badass I know). Having your sideburns connect strictly to your mustache screams I GET SHIT DONE and that just the type of mentality NY needs these days.

"How 'bout you sideburns? You want some of this milk?"

Second, the man knows how to speak his mind, never mind being interrupted by "THE MAN," Mac Daddy says what needs to be said. THE RENT IS TOO DAMN HIGH JIMMY! Living in this economy is the equivalent of being forced to eat Madonna’s unnecessarily hairy bush from the '80s (viewer beware). Sure, I don't struggle to pay my rent but I am effected. Inflation has hit my life. Dutches for $2.25!?!? What the hell is that all about? What ever happened to the reasonable $1.25-.50 range? Even $1.75 is doable but, when one Dutch borders the same value as one gallon of gas somebody has got to stand up and call BULLSHIT.

Thanks Jimmy Mac. You get my vote!

-R.C. Suessmandzadeh