The "Hot Corner" - Maria Sharapova

I present to you one of the world's most beautiful women: Maria Sharapova. Not only is this sizzling Russian vixen an absolutely dime + 99, but she has a ridiculous forehand, and a grunt that makes my pants get bigger. Not sure why it happens, but it seems to resemble a tent being pitched. And what is so hot about chicks who could probably beat my ass to a liquidy pulp? I honestly wouldn't even mind being a complete uncle Tom for her everyday needs anyway. I mean, standing next to her can make Yao Ming look miniature as fuck, so no need to get all vertically insecure. Hey Maria, you wanna dress me up in a teddy bear outfit? You got it baby. Wanna pet my belly and tell me I've been a good boy today and fetched all your tennis balls? Where do I sign up? Fuck it, I'll dress up as Nick Nack from the Bond flick "The Man With The Golden Gun" and let you kick me around like a feeble peasant. Let me slap on that monkey suit and look up at your gorgeously infinite legs while I look in the mirror and remind myself that I'm your 2 foot tall slave butler. Being Maria's bitch while she struts around in those dick wrecking tennis outfits? Yes please.

Also, who's to say we don't fall in love? I mean, everyone that know's Dbl-A is well aware that I murder it on the tennis court like it's dirt off my shoulder. We could be hitting partners, as long as people don't mistake me for a tree stump when they see me standing next to her. Mad tall. But, like I have always said, it would be no stress making sweet love to Maria at all. Everyone's the same height laying down, and now that's some real chatter!

-Dbl-A